A 5-year old girl tells her grandmother people marry to quarrel and fight. Shocked, the grandma calls up her daughter to check whether they fight in front of the children.
Playschool and KG teachers I've interacted with have told me several instances of bad behavior in children that can be attributed to unhappiness prevailing at home.
Dr A Nirmala, a leading child psychologist, in whose Shantiniketan School, my son Darshan had his early education, often said they sometimes got children at age 3 and above in a spoilt condition and faced an uphill task setting them right.
When I first became a parent I was apprehensive of living up to the role. My fears led to me read several books on child psychology and parenting.
Early childhood experiences can turn out to be bad or good depending on how each child perceives the problem later on and how parents, teachers, relatives and friends respond to it.
I was myself a subject of ridicule in early school days for my clumsy looks and below average academics compared to my intelligent brother. In Transactional Analysis terms, the Child in me was only having unedited feelings associated with " I am not Ok" for a long time. But I was able to overcome this without any professional help. May be it was the English language teachers who spotted my potential to write and some friends at college who saw my skills suited for the media industry that helped overcome the crisis.
Dr Sunita, a leading child psychiatrist who held a session at Diyah's Rajagiri Kindergarten emphasised the need for a good family atmosphere for the balanced development of a child. She said that atleast for dinner, all family members should sit together and share the day's concerns and feelings.
Attention deficit hyperactivity disorders (ADHD) , lack of concentration, poor interpersonal skills, bullying, stealing, several other childhood problems can be traced to excessive viewing of TV by parents, lack of intimacy between parents, quarrel some atmosphere at home, and lack of quality time parents give to children.
In these days of double income-1-2 kids families, parents are under pressure to advance their careers that they sometimes fail to give quality time to their children. So I was really happy to learn about Manu Kappan and Amrita who left high paying jobs in UK to give quality time for their daughter Rose, a friend of our daughter Diyah.
Diyah is herself struggling to overcome the trauma of 3-month separation from us when she was just one and a half years old as my wife was busy with her pharmacy business and we had to sent her to her mother's place seeing her only once or twice a week.
Even now when Diyah insists we should be with her where ever she goes and Aswathy gets irritated- I've a hard time convincing her it is not Diyah's fault but the unedited recordings in her Child that gives a feeling of fear, insecurity and inadequacy that plays again and again, needing positive strokes from time to time from us.
I don't know whether I am right in treating my children as friends but always with them as a guide. But will it rob them of the do's and don'ts that are staple recording in our Parent? (In every day psychological realm, it is the Super Ego).
I am no doubt indebted to Mr Hari Kartha (Amritha TV), renowned journalist,my first mentor and guide in the competitive media world, for an important parental lesson. His father was also a well-known journalist. Seeing a framed photo of his father in his home, I asked him how far was he an influence in selecting Journalism as a career. Hari said his father had only warned: "Never Son, never into Journalism." Then what was his contribution to you as a person? Hari said he did not inherit money or wealth from his father but only a set of good values to live by.
This conversation took place even before I had thought of marriage. But every time I spend time with my children, I get reminded of the importance of values. That's the most inexpensive gift you can give your children that can help them sail over the viccissitudes of life.
Playschool and KG teachers I've interacted with have told me several instances of bad behavior in children that can be attributed to unhappiness prevailing at home.
Dr A Nirmala, a leading child psychologist, in whose Shantiniketan School, my son Darshan had his early education, often said they sometimes got children at age 3 and above in a spoilt condition and faced an uphill task setting them right.
When I first became a parent I was apprehensive of living up to the role. My fears led to me read several books on child psychology and parenting.
Early childhood experiences can turn out to be bad or good depending on how each child perceives the problem later on and how parents, teachers, relatives and friends respond to it.
I was myself a subject of ridicule in early school days for my clumsy looks and below average academics compared to my intelligent brother. In Transactional Analysis terms, the Child in me was only having unedited feelings associated with " I am not Ok" for a long time. But I was able to overcome this without any professional help. May be it was the English language teachers who spotted my potential to write and some friends at college who saw my skills suited for the media industry that helped overcome the crisis.
Dr Sunita, a leading child psychiatrist who held a session at Diyah's Rajagiri Kindergarten emphasised the need for a good family atmosphere for the balanced development of a child. She said that atleast for dinner, all family members should sit together and share the day's concerns and feelings.
Attention deficit hyperactivity disorders (ADHD) , lack of concentration, poor interpersonal skills, bullying, stealing, several other childhood problems can be traced to excessive viewing of TV by parents, lack of intimacy between parents, quarrel some atmosphere at home, and lack of quality time parents give to children.
In these days of double income-1-2 kids families, parents are under pressure to advance their careers that they sometimes fail to give quality time to their children. So I was really happy to learn about Manu Kappan and Amrita who left high paying jobs in UK to give quality time for their daughter Rose, a friend of our daughter Diyah.
Diyah is herself struggling to overcome the trauma of 3-month separation from us when she was just one and a half years old as my wife was busy with her pharmacy business and we had to sent her to her mother's place seeing her only once or twice a week.
Even now when Diyah insists we should be with her where ever she goes and Aswathy gets irritated- I've a hard time convincing her it is not Diyah's fault but the unedited recordings in her Child that gives a feeling of fear, insecurity and inadequacy that plays again and again, needing positive strokes from time to time from us.
I don't know whether I am right in treating my children as friends but always with them as a guide. But will it rob them of the do's and don'ts that are staple recording in our Parent? (In every day psychological realm, it is the Super Ego).
I am no doubt indebted to Mr Hari Kartha (Amritha TV), renowned journalist,my first mentor and guide in the competitive media world, for an important parental lesson. His father was also a well-known journalist. Seeing a framed photo of his father in his home, I asked him how far was he an influence in selecting Journalism as a career. Hari said his father had only warned: "Never Son, never into Journalism." Then what was his contribution to you as a person? Hari said he did not inherit money or wealth from his father but only a set of good values to live by.
This conversation took place even before I had thought of marriage. But every time I spend time with my children, I get reminded of the importance of values. That's the most inexpensive gift you can give your children that can help them sail over the viccissitudes of life.
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